Everyone is doing it.

Everyone is rushing to claim their soulmate from date #1 through dating apps & sites such as Tinder, Match.com, eHarmony and Coffee Meets Bagel, in fear that they’d turn old and become the last pick on the planet.

Including me.

I didn’t like the idea of it — dating someone based on a pixelated photo along with a brief (and often superficial) rundown of their interest and hobbies, but I was determined to find someone who could fulfill my empty heart.

So I went on 45+ dates in 4 years, pushing myself to make things work with each date.

But towards the end, I felt more frustrated. I just couldn’t stand the cheesy pick-up lines, the nude photos and the awkward moments whenever a date tried to pull a move on me too fast.

And it made me realize that,

Finding love online isn’t easy, especially if you’re someone who prioritizes personality over good looks, or if you’re seeking a long-term relationship over a one night stand. Simply because too many people are skipping the handshake and going right for the kiss.

There’s not much deep conversation. Nor are there special commitments. Dates just treat you as a choice than a real human being (at least in the beginning).

Now I’m not saying you should give up online dating forever. It‘s still possible to find love online. But that’d require both parties to put in the extra effort to understand each other until they realize this could work.

Otherwise, it’s probably better to meet someone in real life who shares the same passion and drive as you and puts you as first priority.

That’s all for this post. Now time to go get ready for my Tinder date.

  1. Esdras
    Nov 25, 2017

    Oh God, this is so real, intense and… Well, I don’t exactly have a word for that, but I feel the same a lot.
    Particularly I don’t consider myself as a “one night date person”. I’m not interested in talking bullshits and surface things, giving some kisses and saying goodbye forever. I can’t see the people like this. I can not treat them like this. I always wanting more, like discover their stories, goals and life’s vision. Or what they think about life outside the Earth, or what their favorite quotes. I want to know and and relate to real people with real stories and real personalities.
    It’s so difficult when you’re liking someone on virtual. It gets worst when you’re too far and can’t see each other or touch (especially feel) each other… Well, pros and cons about 21’s life, I guess…
    Thanks for this text! It makes so thoughtful. And I still will think about it more, much more…